Journal

Painting a Picture of Home

Torin wears the Hava Top, photographed by Pauline Chatelan

When Torin Ashtun was 6 years old, she found solace and escape in creating art as a way of helping her to navigate the volatility of child homelessness. Now a model, gifted artist, and a new mom, her art is no longer a refuge from adversity—instead, it’s a powerful medium of self-expression. Surrounded by her colorful paintings, we spent the afternoon with Torin in her home—which she shares with her husband and one-year-old son—just south of Los Angeles, talking about everything from honing in on one’s creative processes to the surprises of motherhood.

Who/what inspires you? As an artist? As a mother?

The journey of life inspires me. I’ve learned to always see beauty in where I am in life without yearning for more. As an artist, thinking this way has reminded me to acknowledge what I have accomplished rather than solely focusing on the next project. I will always have new ideas and create new works, but to be continuously inspired, I need to be content with where I am now. Recently, I’ve been inspired to pull out older works and add a new flair to them years later. 

As a mother, I’m inspired when I’m at peace with the demanding lifestyle. Some days are harder than others, especially when I am expected to show up authentically every day. I’ve found more moments to make motherhood exciting when I accept life as it is. I used to believe contentment to be limiting, but I’ve found it to be freeing.

Give us a glimpse into your creative process. When and where do you create your works? How does your environment influence your art?

Many of my early works were created in a small studio apartment, and then in a large commercial studio space. In becoming a mother, I let go of my art studio and moved into a quiet, cozy home with my family. Now I create in nearly every room, from the bedrooms to the living room to the dining room. I usually make most of my art when my son is napping, but if I have enough energy, I’ll stay up extra late and work while everyone sleeps. My home environment has inspired me to make art that feels warm and colorful. This has manifested itself as incorporating crochet and punch needling into my paintings.


Are there any artists whose work means a great deal to you? 

There are so many artists whose works leave me speechless, especially those I’ve had the opportunity to see in person. Artists like Lois Mailou Jones, Augusta Savage, Faith Ringgold, and Kara Walker…to name a few. A few newer artists I love are Courtney Heron and Isis Dua.

Torin wears the Hava Top

"Becoming a mother has changed my approach to life, softening me in all the best ways possible."

- Torin Ashtun

How has becoming a mother changed, if at all, the way you approach your art?

Becoming a mother has changed my approach to life, softening me in all the best ways possible. I take my time with everything—and if I have to slow down even more, I know I’ll feel at peace with that.  Motherhood has challenged me to be patient when I thought I was at my wit's end. I have made room for so much love when I thought I was running low. I believe I have chosen to be a better person for myself, my husband, and my son by becoming a mother. This change has shown through my art by taking my ego out of the creative process. I no longer believe I am owed recognition or to sell out of my works. I now receive all that is for me and focus on my role which is to create and love.

You say on your website that your “life as a child was chaos.” Can you tell us more about that? How did those experiences shape the person that you are today?

During my childhood, my four older siblings, my single mother, and myself were homeless. This is when I unknowingly discovered escapism. My family would go to the fishing piers and go grunion hunting for food. We would occasionally spend a weekend at a Motel 6 and see it as a vacation. My mom and older siblings endured so much strife because they were aware of our situation. I was only 6 years old at this time so I saw it as an adventure. When things were rough, I retreated into my mind and created an imaginary happy space to escape my toxic home environment—whether through writing fictional stories in my diary or painting whenever I found art supplies.  My retreat into art continued even when we moved into an apartment, providing a way to escape the family tension. Now, in my mid-20s, I no longer hide behind art. Instead, I amplify my voice and ideas by sharing my work with anyone I can.

What has surprised you about motherhood? 

I was surprised by how natural it felt to care for my son and how it further strengthened my marriage. I found love, community, and protection in my husband so I was not expecting a drastic change once our baby joined us earthside. Motherhood has shown me how limitless love is and how important I am. Even though I have less time for myself, I’ve found that I have enough energy for everything.  Motherhood has inspired me to both take chances and be vulnerable with the world.

Torin wears the Pamelina Dress

Torin wears the Elayne Top and Hilaire Pant

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